December 7, 2015 by positivelypeachie
I am a very calm person – it takes a lot for me to lose my temper, especially in public. I can literally count on one hand the number of times I have lost my temper in front of anyone other than Hubby, the boys or my dogs. I’m sure it’s because I have OCD so I spend my days working on remaining cool and collected, but I prefer life that way. I am not a reactive person and that works for me.
So on Saturday that changed…and while I wish I hadn’t lost my temper, I am not sorry for what happened because it was time something had to be said.
My BIL is not friendly, disciplines his kids harshly, and truly believes no one but him knows a single thing about anything (and will tell you that). He has a fiery temper but only ever loses it with his kids.
At the Christmas Parade, all three boys were misbehaving. They were fidgeting and whining and just being unpleasant…but not that unusual for little kids sitting in the crowded cold waiting for a parade to start. We knew once the parade started, they would be fine. BIL was visibly getting agitated by his kids and little E. He has, since little E was born, disliked him. I don’t know how you dislike a 3 year old but he does – he doesn’t like his mother (my other sister) and that translates in his relationship with E. He’s inclined to get mad at E for things all three kids are doing, but no punish the other two…so for a long time this issue has bothered me.
Anyway, at the parade they were fighting so I had squatted down to break it up when out of no where, BIL comes from behind and grabs E by ONE ARM and drags him to his side and pulls him to a standing position. E is sobbing, because it scared the life out of him, and won’t stand so BIL is yanking up and down on little E instructing him to “F&%$*#@ stand”. Please note, E is 49 pounds of solidness and not at all used to ANY kind of physical punishment.
I snapped, grabbed little E and told my BIL that if he ever touches little E like that he again he will regret it, and stormed off (there was likely a swear word or 25 in there). My sister came after me to apologize, but I just blasted her that I had watched BIL do shit like that for years and I’m tired of it and I won’t tolerate it any longer. Just because he hasn’t left a bruise on anyone, doesn’t meant that it doesn’t hurt! When you act out of sheer anger, solid judgement is absent and anything can happen…and my BIL acts out of sheer anger far too often.
I am still stewing about it.
In the end, none of us got to watch the parade, and BIL didn’t show up the next day to our family Christmas Party, and it’s definitely driven a wedge between he and our family right before Christmas but I don’t care…little E is our responsibility now, and that was NOT OK.
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